Tears should be rollin' down my cheeks and I don't know why but I'm not fallin' apart like I usually do. And how the thought of losin' you's not killin' me.
I feel bad that I can stand here so strong, cold as stone. Seems so wrong, I can't explain it. Maybe it's just I've cried so much. I'm tired and I'm numb, baby I hate it. I feel bad. That I don't feel bad.
I don't have a whole lot to say today so it's a lyrics day. Last night my friend Jordan made me listen to this song because he said it reminded him of me and how stubborn I am. I'd have to say given the light of recent events with my "love life" I agree. Things are a mess and they are complicated and I don't really mind it. I suppose if there is any way to live that sort of thing that's it- a certain degree of apathy without the bitterness which is often a result of it. It's honest and imperfect and if it were any other way I don't think I would be able to do it. With its idleness perfection can be an awfully disappointing thing. I know people are going to walk in and out of my life, give and take parts of me. As long as none of them take the best part of me I think that's okay.
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